not afraid

I am not afraid of you anymore. Your being no longer casts a shadow over mine. I stepped out. Scared and scarred at first. Deep wounds from all the times I let myself become insignificant and unworthy. To what end? Just to be accepted by you. To get crumbs from your safely controlled approval. To be abused for so long I no longer recognised it as such. Instead convincing self that it’s tough love. Love. It’s not even you that I was ever afraid of. No, it was actually my self. Afraid of me. Letting my be be guided or reshaped. So it fit yours. I am not afraid of myself anymore. It’s a bit scary but at the same time so incredibly freeing. I am shattering this mirror. Accepting you as you. Accepting me as me. Knowing very well that if we are to be we need to accept each other. Or cease to be. I choose to be… not afraid… to live!

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