Day 23: Begin Again

Begin again. Another new beginning. Perhaps another wishful thinking. Perhaps time to just accept who I am. Nothing special yet not a nothing either. Stubborn hopeless rebel rebelling against anything resembling reliable, anything resembling steady.

Begin again. Another chance to dig myself out of self produced self pity that led to deep desire to annihilate myself because I have once again failed. Another chance to truly accept self and my own reality of my creation.

Begin again after another low. Perhaps just another manic episode commencing. Another birth of a superhero that can do no wrong, that is fucking amazeballs fantabulous and exceptional. Or maybe, just maybe, I will stay strong enough this time and say fuck off to being a delusional superman that flies through galaxies until suddenly plummeting down into the deepest numbness filled abyss.

Beginning again. One breath at a time.

BEGIN AGAIN
phrase

To occur or happen again. To bring (something) back, or to return to a former state.

To try to do something again after the previous attempts were not successful.

To do something again after a failure, usually with more energy or emphasis than before.

suspended, 2018

3 thoughts on “Day 23: Begin Again

    1. Thank you for witnessing it. Honestly, in many ways every day, every moment actually, is a new beginning or a begin again moment. Sadly we either fail to recognize it or ignore it consciously or perhaps are too scared of accepting the “responsibility” of committing to a change, a new beginning, of a begin again. Nevertheless, as long as we choose to engage and not give up – as long as we DO there’s hope, there’s a chance, there’s a reward in a form of a better, more serene life. Hence, let’s embrace the New Moon, absorb the energy and just fucking BE what we actually want to be! 🙏🤍🙏

      Liked by 1 person

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