Day 21: Random

I sleep while walking around today. It’s not a deep kind of sleep. It’s closer to the kind of sleep when you are not really aware that you are sleeping until you suddenly wake up and as actual realisation hits you that you were sleeping you are instantly drenched in sweat. We are talking huge droplets of sweat.

I walk around and have interactions that feel as if I am not in the same realm. I guess it’s similar to talking to a ghost. Not that I know how talking to a ghost feels like. Unless we count all my conversations with my past self about all of the mistakes, stupidities, reckless choices, etc. past me committed. But those shouldn’t count because if they do then I’d have to count in all of the present day interactions that I have with myself. Yes, let’s not count any of that in because that would make me sound really pathetic and sad.

Sounds of music echo inside my head as I pass by translucent humans. Wow! I’m gliding through the air. I swear I can’t feel my feet touching the ground. Could it be that I have diabetes? I heard that one of the conditions of severe diabetes is that you stop feeling limbs. Shit. I might have severe diabetes and that is why I feel like I am floating.

What if I actually am floating though? Could I learn how to float higher and higher so I can soar like the birds do? Ah, those magnificent birds high up in the sky with nothing but a gentle breeze and warm touch of the sun caresses my body. Yes, that seems more probable than severe diabetes.

I wonder if there will be any need for clothes once I will learn how to fly? Wouldn’t it be better to let my body adapt to the flying in the sky on its own? Although, it might not be the prettiest of sights to see a middle aged naked body that is a few kilograms too heavy. OK maybe saying a few kilograms is an a pretty white lie… Yes, I must lose that access weight that I packed over the winter. Just to give a little bit of a break to my joints and heart.

How much do ghosts weigh? I need to ask them that. Here comes one just now…

Turns out I am not talking to ghosts at all. That was an actual living human being and she was not happy when I asked her about the weight. Neither was her male companion. I apologised. It didn’t seem like they accepted it.

I guess I am not asleep after all. I guess I am not talking to ghosts either. Am i floating though? No, I guess wishful thinking doesn’t make things a reality. Sigh.

Seriously though, it really bothers me that I still don’t know how much an average ghost weighs. i can already see me obsessing about this for days if not weeks. Need a distraction fast.

Gorilla. Espresso. Done.

I seem to use the word “though” a lot. What is that all about?


Made, done, or happening without method or conscious decision.

Unfamiliar or unspecified.

surviving Beijing, 2016

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