right here right now

As I battle with myself tirelessly. Not allowing much breathing room. Except when I drown my sorrows and regrets in what is just another regret in aftermath. Be it excessive drinking. Punishing workouts. Insatiable gluttony. Embarrassing lust. Desperately searching to belong. Feeding numerous obsessions that lead to further degradation of self. Still. I cling on. Hold on. At times on not much more than a thin thread of skin that still clings onto the tip of my fingers. I hold on. Letting rage take over. Releasing my thundering roar. Climbing back out of the slump. To stand again. On top of the mountain. Battered. Bruised. Bloodied. Letting the air of temporary freedom fill my lungs. Feeling… full… fulfilled… alive!

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